Positive Health Online

I was settling up with a new client when she asked "And what is the recommended gratuity?" I explained that "while I appreciate the thought it was not necessary". She was very surprised and commented that the last few places (both spa and private practice) she went to had a mandatory gratuity policy. This really drives me crazy. 

The definition of mandatory is: containing or CONSTITUTING a command: OBLIGATORY

The definition of a gratuity is: something given voluntarily or beyond obligation usually for some service; generally in the form of a TIP.

A gratuity is just that. When a person is happy with a service that has been provided for them and wish to show their appreciation. So would someone please explain to me how demanding a client be grateful for the service they have paid you to perform, whether or not they actually did appreciate it, acceptable? Especially to the point of requiring they give more money on top of the already established fee?

Now I am not saying one should not accept a gratuity. I believe it is a personal choice. It is up to the individual as to whether or not they wish to offer a gratuity and to accept one. As I mentioned earlier, I always tell my clients it is not necessary, but if they insist I will accept because of what the offering means to them. I usually put the tip in a draw and then make a donation somewhere down the road with it; my way of paying it forward. But again, this is my choice; there is nothing wrong if another therapist decided to keep the offering. The therapist performed a service to the best of their ability and were rewarded for their efforts.

I know that there are a few points of view out there in regard to the Massage Profession. The first is we are a service industry and that there is no reason why we should not accept tips. The second is that we are healthcare providers, the same as doctors and physical therapists, and it is unprofessional to accept tips. We are all in service in one way or another from the doctor to therapist to contractors to the waitress at the local dinner. It is always uplifting when one is complimented or thanked for a job well done. Where the distinction falls as to who should or should not receive a gratuity is commonly left up to proper social etiquette. What most fail to see is that if we follow proper etiquette everyone receives a tip; hospitals are giving grants, doctors receive the fruit basket or bottle of wine at the holidays. We leave holiday bonuses for the mailman and the garbage collectors. We leave the tip on the table at the end of the meal for the waitress. How much we give, if at all, is a personal choice. While society likes to comment on the end results it is no one else's business and it is certainly no one else right to demand that their way of doing something be adhered to.  

There is also the unwarranted distinction of whether or not the therapist is working for themselves or on staff at a spa. In other words, it is required to tip the therapist at a spa because the house is taking a cut and the therapist makes less. First off, the therapist chooses to work for the spa and that alone does not make them worthy of a gratuity. If the client is really pleased with the service then by all means have at it, but the client should not be required to do so. It is a bad habit of some spas to make gratuities mandatory to make up for the low wages they pay the therapist. So in other words, the Spa is demanding the client not only pay them for the service but also share the cost of paying the salary of the therapist. If a spa wants quality staff, then pay a decent wage.

A client once told me how she went to a Spa where the staff was rude. She waited 20 minutes past her appointment time and the massage was just ok. In spite of all of this, when she paid for her treatment, she included a tip as etiquette required and she was promptly informed out loud "that is not how we do it here; your tip is not enough". She felt so embarrassed she gave them more money and fled. Granted this is not the norm, but what is the incentive, for those who need one, to do a good job if they are already guaranteed a bonus not matter how they perform?

As far as not tipping a therapist in private practice because all of the money goes to them – well, please, the therapist is paying their own overhead and has bills like everyone else. But either way if the client is pleased with the massage, there is no reason not to express their appreciation and it is up to the therapist to choose to accept it. That's all I am saying.